Let's try this again..........



If you know me, you know I am super scared of heights! So, I can't stand roller coasters. The speed doesn't bother me, because, I'm kind of a speed freak, but the height makes me want to puke! I've only been on one roller coaster in my life and that was at the age of 10. My dad forced me to go, boy did he regret that! I was so scared that I bit his shoulder! Haha! TAKE THAT!!!

Anyways, back to where I was going with this, you know that feeling when you hit the low spot? You know that feeling that makes your stomach drop? Then you start slowly climbing the next hill and you hear the click-click-click of the gears on the coaster and your stomach starts to get a quesy feeling and you want to just jump off or yell STOP! I change my mind! Then all of  sudden it feels like the floor just dropped out from under you and you really want to puke! 

I would have never thought that I could feel all of those feelings without actually being on a roller coaster! I have had all of those feelings for too long. I have felt so much pressure on me, especially this last week. It's taken me awhile to admit what it actually was. The Holy Spirit was really trying to convict me. He knew I was heading down a path that I wasn't supposed to be on. So, this morning I prayed to basically start over, to submit fully to God, to start going deeper into the water, trying my hardest to follow God's will for my life. This has proven to be one of the most difficult things that I could do. So, for me, it starts with actually spending time with Him, by reading the bible, praying, seriously praying and just being in His presence.

So, now the true test comes. Will I be able to have more peace and joy in my life by doing this? I know I probably shouldn't think of it as a test. But, that feeling, that feeling of being under God's thumb and not being able to move I can't stand any longer. Will that let up as I do what He 's calling me to do? 


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