Silence, It's not so golden


Image result for Scripture silenceHave you ever been afraid of the silence? Silence to me is a curse, it's the means to drive myself crazy within my own thoughts! It starts all innocent, you should have said this, instead of this; you should have done this, instead of this. Then it starts going even more backwards. The past creeps up on me, the mistakes I'v made, the sins I've committed. Yes, I know they are all forgiven, but that doesn't stop the haunting.

So, I just get home and the house is perfectly quiet! I am the only one home. The first thing I want to do is get some loud music going. Then I had this thought that said, "No, you have to be okay with the silence." I made a goal to sit in silence, (even though I'm typing) for 15 minutes or more. So, I googled "scripture silence," just those two words. Here's one of the first images that I see:



"Listen to God in the silence of your heart and you will know His perfect plans for you." Psalm 37:4

Now, I have to change my focus. As I sit here, I'm not focusing on the past, but those that need prayer, including myself. That I may find the strength to open up more, that I may find joy & peace, that my marriage continually improves. That I may actually trust God, and others who He has placed in my life. That I may be able to be follow His will. That I may just be happy, more times than not. That I may stop struggling, that I may give into whatever He wants me to give in to, that I completely sacrifice myself for His love, that I completely surrender & submit to HIM, the Lord My God!!!!!

As I sit here typing I get this text from a friend, "You are an amazing women, I believe in you!" Why do others believe in me? I don't understand how others can have so much confidence and love for me? It was exactly what I needed to hear at the right time. I don't think I'm an amazing women, but it was so nice to hear that someone out there believes in me. Do you need to hear that today? I pray that someone says that to you.

I made it over 30 minutes, in the silence! Yay! I have overcome! (Well, today anyways.) Was God here? I don't know, but Deuteronomy 31:6 says "Be strong and courageous, do not be terrified because of them, for the Lord you God goes with you, He will never leave you nor forsake you." So, I have to trust that this is true. Maybe one of these days I will know that He is with me.

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